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Loving Adeline

Loss, Infertility, Parenthood and Beyond

You are here: Home / Blog / A Baby Shower for our Miracle Baby

A Baby Shower for our Miracle Baby

September 22, 2019 Blog, Family

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A baby shower is not something we thought we would do. I have avoided going to them for the past three years because they are so triggers. I have walked completely around stores to avoid baby things. I have hidden pregnant people and new parents on my Facebook account because it is too hard to look at.

We never had a baby shower for Adeline, however we still had bought things for her and had received things for her. We had the choice of returning the things or letting them sit in the closet. We let them sit. There was no way I could walk into a store to return something I never got to use for her.

Photo by Nynne Schrøder on Unsplash

After having a stillbirth, battling infertility for years, experiencing miscarriage and a boat load of triggering moments, we did not think we would be brave enough to have a baby shower. We did not think we would want to possibly have a party hosted that could hurt someone else. We did not think we could open gifts in front of people without totally collapsing into tears.

Maternity dress gifted by PinkBlush Maternity

And then, somewhere along this miracle pregnancy, our courage started to shake it’s way out. We decided that, yes, we wanted to experience everything we could with this pregnancy regardless of the outcome. We wanted to let our friends and family shower us with love and support after not knowing what to do to support us along our heartbreaking journey for so long. 

  • My parents
  • Dylan’s parents

So, we booked flights for a 24 hour trip to California from Seattle for a baby shower for our miracle baby. And we are so glad we did.

Pregnancy Milestone card by Nuts & Bolts Paper Co.

The last time we’ve been around this much family at one time was our wedding three years ago. Shower aside, it made our hearts swell to just be able to spend time with the people we love – even if only for a few hours. We got to hug and congratulate a friend for the first time since she got married. We got to meet the newest baby cousin. See how much some of the other “baby” cousins have grown. We soaked up every second with some of our most favorite people.

  • Friends
  • Cousins
  • The girl behind the party!

Holy cow, my family knows how to throw a party and show up for a party. My cousin Cynthia, cousin-in-law Alli, and Aunt Jeanette put together the most magical shower down to every last detail. It was more than we could have ever asked for or dreamed of. It was so very special. (Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!) 

Little baby boy Rapp, we are so excited to meet you and we are growing more nervous by the day on how in the world you’re going to get from in there to out here. Ha! 51 days until your due date. 51!

2 Comments Categories: Blog, Family
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  1. Autumn says

    December 24, 2019 at 9:25 am

    Hi Jean-e! I am so sorry to her of your heartbreak but so amazed by your strength. Thank you for sharing your powerful story with the world! I had two very close calls during my own pregnancy that thankfully brought me my little girl, but with a lot of emotional damage. It is so amazing reading your journey and I wish you and your family so much happiness in the years to come!

    Reply
  2. Loving Adeline says

    January 13, 2020 at 2:00 pm

    Autumn, Thank you for the sweet words! It’s sure been a journey! I am so happy to hear that your little girl arrived. I know we can carry some emotional turmoil after those pregnancy scares along with all the joy. Happy new year to you and your family!

    Reply

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Find me on insta @lovingadeline

Luckiest mama on the block ✨ . . @forloveandlitt Luckiest mama on the block ✨
.
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@forloveandlittles spring collection is 👌🏻 If you are looking for simple, high quality basics for your littles, it’s one of our favorites shops to support. It’s a small shop, local (to seattle), woman owned and gives back to the infertility community. I adore @rechellelewis ‘s heart and her mission is very near and dear to my heart. Check her stuff out! (Not sponsored)
I hope you always explore with your heart and your I hope you always explore with your heart and your eyes wide open, the way you do now. Watching you take on the world is a dream 🖤
.
Tomorrow is the last day to take advantage of 15% off site wide over at @indiegraceco ✨ Use code: JEAN15 to support the sweetest mama and her small shop.
We are going to look back on this time and think a We are going to look back on this time and think about how:
.
We didn’t hug our people for over a year.
In fact, we didn’t see most of our people either.
We didn’t see a single persons smile outside of our home.
How much we missed as second time first time parents.
We stretched grocery shopping to 2 weeks, and turned to online shopping wherever and whenever possible to avoid the risk of going to stores.
We felt isolated, frustrated and emotional on many days.
.
AND we will also remember:
.
We were given the gift of time as a family.
We embraced the slowness of life.
We protected our health and the health of our loved ones by staying safe, staying home and wearing our masks.
We saw B roll over, crawl, climb, walk and discover things in his surroundings for the first time.
We ate breakfast, lunch and dinner at the table together, every single day.
We rocked you, and read the same nap time book, for every single nap every single day.
We waved to the garbage person every Thursday and the mail carrier each afternoon from our front porch.
We read, and read, and read, and read some more and danced, and danced, and danced some more.
We breastfed, we bonded, we laughed and learned and cried and learned and knew even at the hardest and most frustrating moments of juggling a pandemic, working remotely and raising a baby turning into a toddler in front of our eyes, that we were the lucky ones.
.
What’s one thing you never want to forget about this crazy time in our life during a global pandemic?
Just a little brother loving on his big sissy bear Just a little brother loving on his big sissy bear 🤍
.
A friend of ours made B this bear with Adeline’s swaddle and stitched her name into it. Such a treasure.
•
•
•
•
•
#lovingadeline #togetherwearebrave #ivfsuccess #FETsuccess #toddlerhood #parentingafterloss #rainbowbaby #motherhoodisdarling #watchthemgrow #magicalchildhood #mymotherhood #holdthemoments #embracingaslowlife #littlemamamoments #mommyblog #mothering #mamahood

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Copyright © 2018 Loving Adeline

Luckiest mama on the block ✨ . . @forloveandlitt Luckiest mama on the block ✨
.
.
@forloveandlittles spring collection is 👌🏻 If you are looking for simple, high quality basics for your littles, it’s one of our favorites shops to support. It’s a small shop, local (to seattle), woman owned and gives back to the infertility community. I adore @rechellelewis ‘s heart and her mission is very near and dear to my heart. Check her stuff out! (Not sponsored)
I hope you always explore with your heart and your I hope you always explore with your heart and your eyes wide open, the way you do now. Watching you take on the world is a dream 🖤
.
Tomorrow is the last day to take advantage of 15% off site wide over at @indiegraceco ✨ Use code: JEAN15 to support the sweetest mama and her small shop.
We are going to look back on this time and think a We are going to look back on this time and think about how:
.
We didn’t hug our people for over a year.
In fact, we didn’t see most of our people either.
We didn’t see a single persons smile outside of our home.
How much we missed as second time first time parents.
We stretched grocery shopping to 2 weeks, and turned to online shopping wherever and whenever possible to avoid the risk of going to stores.
We felt isolated, frustrated and emotional on many days.
.
AND we will also remember:
.
We were given the gift of time as a family.
We embraced the slowness of life.
We protected our health and the health of our loved ones by staying safe, staying home and wearing our masks.
We saw B roll over, crawl, climb, walk and discover things in his surroundings for the first time.
We ate breakfast, lunch and dinner at the table together, every single day.
We rocked you, and read the same nap time book, for every single nap every single day.
We waved to the garbage person every Thursday and the mail carrier each afternoon from our front porch.
We read, and read, and read, and read some more and danced, and danced, and danced some more.
We breastfed, we bonded, we laughed and learned and cried and learned and knew even at the hardest and most frustrating moments of juggling a pandemic, working remotely and raising a baby turning into a toddler in front of our eyes, that we were the lucky ones.
.
What’s one thing you never want to forget about this crazy time in our life during a global pandemic?
Just a little brother loving on his big sissy bear Just a little brother loving on his big sissy bear 🤍
.
A friend of ours made B this bear with Adeline’s swaddle and stitched her name into it. Such a treasure.
•
•
•
•
•
#lovingadeline #togetherwearebrave #ivfsuccess #FETsuccess #toddlerhood #parentingafterloss #rainbowbaby #motherhoodisdarling #watchthemgrow #magicalchildhood #mymotherhood #holdthemoments #embracingaslowlife #littlemamamoments #mommyblog #mothering #mamahood
Every once in awhile you just need a farm animal o Every once in awhile you just need a farm animal on the feed, yknow? 🐐
•
•
•
•
•
#lovingadeline #togetherwearebrave #ivfsuccess #FETsuccess #toddlerhood #parentingafterloss #rainbowbaby #motherhoodisdarling #watchthemgrow #magicalchildhood #mymotherhood #holdthemoments #embracingaslowlife #littlemamamoments #mommyblog #mothering #mamahood
Just give this boy equal parts outdoor adventures, Just give this boy equal parts outdoor adventures, piles of books and music and you have the recipe for a VERY happy B.
.
.
Thank you, @indiegraceco for gifting Beckett this adorable boho little explorer tee - it is so him 🤍
.
.
Use code JEAN15 for 15% off at @indiegraceco / small Canadian based shop with mama and baby items, all hand made. ✨
•
•
•
•
•
#lovingadeline #togetherwearebrave #ivfsuccess #FETsuccess #toddlerhood #parentingafterloss #rainbowbaby #motherhoodisdarling #watchthemgrow #magicalchildhood #mymotherhood #holdthemoments #embracingaslowlife #littlemamamoments #mommyblog #mothering #mamahood
It’s been a minute since I took a selfie but thi It’s been a minute since I took a selfie but this day deserves to have a place here.
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On March 2, last year I packed a lunch, my pump bag and cried the whole way to work as I returned to teaching after being on maternity leave. I had 11 students absent because families were worried about the new virus in town - COVID-19. By Thursday of that week, our district was one of the first to shut its doors in the country and rapidly set up a plan for remote learning.
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Exactly one year later, I got my first dose of the vaccine. I cried tears of joy and relief as I drove away - feeling hopeful that a sense of normalcy is on the horizon.
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This past year has been wild. There’s been so many ups and downs. I’ve sold my sole to my job, working around the clock to make sure my students are still learning, still growing, still loving learning while trying to ignore the people on the internet causing a stink that teachers “are getting off easy” and “need to get back to work.”
.
I’ve been given the gift of time with Beckett and have not missed a single second of his first 16 months of life (other than the few days that schools were open when I returned). We’ve had breakfast, lunch and dinner at the table as a family every single day. I’ve grieved the fact that yet again I don’t get to share new parenthood with anyone, just in a very different way.
.
Not one single person has been in our home for over a year, we haven’t seen any family but one time in July and Beckett really doesn’t know anything other than us. 
.
But we’re healthy. And now I’m vaccinated and Dylan gets his first dose on Monday. Hope and hugs are on the horizon. 🤍
Happy birthday, Adeline. Year five. The edges aren Happy birthday, Adeline. Year five. The edges aren’t as jagged anymore from day to day but when the waves come crashing, they still feel just as intense and heavy. You would have been the best big sister to Beckett. He points to the Angel in his room in the mornings and we say “good morning” everyday. He gave me a kiss from his “Addie Bear” at bedtime tonight. He knows. I’m just so angry I can’t watch the two of you grow up together. We all love you so much and miss you and wish you were here with us.
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